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August 28, 2017
In this brisk and moving memoir, Corrigan (The Middle Place) explores the language and terrain of intimacy, delving into some of the most difficult and significant things people say to one another. In 12 brief essays, Corrigan describes the ways in which phrases such as “tell me more” and “I know” have shaped her closest relationships. In the title essay, Corrigan slowly raises the stakes, with masterly results (when her sixth-grade daughter calls to talk of an incident in school, Corrigan simply says, “Tell me about it,” rather than something more accusative, and her daughter divulges everything). She also contemplates the many meanings of “I love you” (to a sibling, it could be “Even though we hardly agree about a thing, including who should be president... I love you”) and writes about how the phrase “I know” offers the salve of empathy when no other words will do. At the heart of the memoir is Corrigan’s examination of her friendship with Liz, who died from ovarian cancer. “Every important conversation I have, for the rest of my life, will have a little bit to do with her,” Corrigan writes. At one point, she considers the truth that sometimes only silence can properly evoke. The essays are impactful, and Corrigan offers solid wisdom throughout.
Starred review from November 15, 2017
Ruminations about the power of 12 of life's essential phrases and the difficulty in learning to say them out loud.Corrigan (Glitter and Glue, 2013, etc.) may be a bestselling author, but she doesn't always know the right thing to say, especially when it comes to the ones she loves most. In the collection's titular essay, the author struggles to communicate with her teenage daughter until a childhood friend encourages her to do less talking and more listening, a strategy she implements when her father is diagnosed with terminal cancer. In "I Know," Corrigan's experience volunteering at a camp for children who have lost someone to cancer reminds her how comforting physical company--rather than apology--can be during times of tragedy and loss. "I Was Wrong," the funniest entry in the collection, uses a dog, an unflushed toilet, and a parental meltdown to highlight the power and near-impossible difficulty of admitting personal fault. In the deeply affecting entry "Onward," moving on from tragedy takes on a new weight. With heartfelt humor and penetrating insight, Corrigan uses the pain, anguish, failure, and occasional successes in her life to explore the vital connection between the words we say and the relationships we develop, both with the people around us and ourselves. Punctuated with her signature warmth and unflinching honesty, her introspective musings gush with empathy for every partner, parent, child, or friend who has said the wrong thing at the wrong time. At times laugh-out-loud funny but overwhelmingly bittersweet, this brief book spans time and experience to drive home a seemingly simple but significant message: finding the right words is a lifelong journey. Other phrases include "I Love You" and "No Words at All."Moving and deeply personal, Corrigan's portraits of love and loss urge readers to speak more carefully and hold on tighter to the people they love.
COPYRIGHT(2017) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
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